Why Can't We Not Be Sober?

A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away (and a lot warmer), I had the pleasure of being introduced to the phenomenon that is fine wine by a rather spectacular friend of mine (MICHY!!!).  I don't doubt we were drinking anything more than Two Buck Chuck at the time but it was delicious and started me down a long twisty road of wine tasting and collecting.  Together we've wine tasted in Napa Valley and Temecula and I've gone up to Chelan several times to check out what Washington has to offer.  Which makes it surprising that the one item I really have NOT craved or desired while doing the Whole30 diet is wine (or beer).  Not that I was a huge drinker prior to the diet but I just figured I'd miss the occasional glass of wine with dinner. 

This past weekend, I checked out a punk show put on by a couple of local bands up in Cashmere.  It was at the Pioneer House and, once the music got going and the kids started dancing, really reminded me of my college days and nights spent at the Nile. (Which is apparently now "world famous" - I can be proud to say I was there when it all started.)  So even though nearly everyone in attendance had a beer or two in hand, I didn't ever think once that I really wanted a drink.  (Unlike when someone eats pizza in front of me and it takes all of my willpower not to kick him in the kneecaps and steal the pizza....)  The even stranger thing is that although tomorrow is my very last day on the diet, it's not a glass of wine that I'm looking forward to the most.  In fact, if someone said you can either (1) eat tortilla chips or (2) have a Hop, Skip n Go Naked, I'd totally pick Option 1.  I just don't have the urge to drink.  But, um...   tortilla chips.  Mmm......

I'm working on getting a bunch of my recipes and resources put together since my diet has generated a little bit of buzz through the hospital and friends on Facebook.  I basically talked to other friends and Googled the crap out of the diet.  Some of it is already here on the blog, some of it is tucked away in that special place that is my brain and I ought to get it out of there before it goes missing.

Day 25 - I put my new found cooking skills to the test by having company over.  I made the spicy beef lettuce wraps but turned it into a salad instead of wraps.  I didn't poison TB so I guess it was a success.  Checked out the Eastmont High School's production of Little Shop of Horrors after dinner and it was awesome.  There's some serious talent at that school. 

Days 26, 27 - Nothing exciting to eat on these days although I made a double batch of curry using the red curry paste for the first time. I also used my mini cookie cutters when I chopped up my bell peppers so I had little red hearts and green trees in the curry.  Sometimes I just amaze myself with my awesomeness.  Ha!

WCotD = Definitely NOT Mustard Greens.  Whoever thought it'd be a good idea to eat that crap, ought to be shot.  Pizza.  Definitely pizza. 

This video reminds me of the Friday and Saturday nights spent at the Atomic Cafe. 

With a Little Help from my Friends

I just have to say, I love my friends.  I've truly been blessed with the greatest bunch of ladies who get my weird humor, place bets on when various important events in my life will occur and basically give me a hard time while they live vicariously through me.

Piggybacking on the conversation regarding my Domestic Disaster status, Sara found it pretty hilarious that my spaghetti squash cooking experience didn't quite pan out.  The conversation went a little like this:

S-  "How did you cook it?"
K-  "Uh, sliced it and grilled it?"
S-  "Oh dear."
K-  ::silence::
S-  "Do you need a lesson"
K-  "Duh."
S-  ::proceeds to instruct me on the proper preparation::
S-  "Make sense?"
K-  "PICTURES!!!"
S-  "Stay tuned.  This is going to be good."
K-  ::sits down and prepares to be "blown away by [Sara's] mad skillz"::


© Sara Deason, 2011


Really, it couldn't be any easier?  Right?!  In fact, I got so excited about making the spaghetti "noodles" and documenting my progress that I actually forgot to make the spaghetti sauce.  Oops.  I stuck the "noodles" in a baggie and froze them thinking that I could defrost them after I made my sauce the next day.  Turns out they're kind of bland but that might have been due to the heating-freezing-melting than the actual squash.  I made the actual spaghetti sauce from scratch, and while tasty, it didn't quite have the zing I like (read that as vampire fighting quantities of garlic). 

My "noodles" up close

The finished product!

I might try making spaghetti squash "noodles" again but for the time being, I'll stick to grilling slices of zucchini. Yummy!!

Day 16:  I tried to stick to a no fruit diet for the day.  Used my new French Press for two HUGE cups of coffee in the morning, snacked on toasted sunflower seeds throughout the day, piece of garlic salted steak for lunch, spaghetti and squash for dinner and cantaloupe for a midnight snack after Roller Derby practice. 

WCotD = Pepsi

Walking Contradiction

I've always maintained that I can't cook.  There are very few occasions that I have not managed to set off the fire alarm when "cooking".  I've set a stove (and the kitchen wall) on fire making popcorn.  I've sliced and diced various parts of my body with sharp knives.  I've dumped a can of hot oil down the front of me.  I'm sure there's quite a few other disasters but I seem to have blocked them from my memory to protect the innocent. 

That all seems to have changed with the Whole30 diet.  No, not the disasters...  Those still happen (sliced my finger on Day 1, burnt my kale chips on Day 15).  The ability to cook.  I am actually enjoying cooking.  Alert the media!!  I find myself in the kitchen aisle looking at gadgets to make my culinary experience that much more enjoyable.  I bought an apple corer - not the slick corer/peeler/slicer that my mom has, just a manual shove-it-down-on-the-apple thing (it's in Kitchen-Aid red, one of my favorite colors).  Those straws I bought at IKEA three years ago are now finally getting used with the slushies and smoothies I'm making using the Magic Bullet blending system.  I learned what a Dutch Oven is - can't find one cheap to buy but I know what it is!!  I'm copying recipes out of magazines and books.  I've bought a WHOLE chicken. 

Perhaps after a while of cooking and spending time in the kitchen, I'll learn to pay attention to where my fingers are at all times and remember that there's something cooking on the stove before I wander off and ...  squirrel!!  I am the Domestic Disaster. Bwahahahaha!!

Just don't let the guys know I enjoy cooking now... I'll never get out of the kitchen!!

Day 10 - nothing exciting here... I didn't actually eat much last week due to being sick.  I did make a baked banana dish to take to the Bling Session.  I wasn't sure about mixing lemons and bananas but it was tasty.  I imagine mushing it up and using it as a filling in a cupcake or a layer in a cake.

Day 11 - Date night included dinner out at a lovely little Mexican restaurant.  I had chicken fajitas without the tortillas and sour cream.  Poor waitress probably thought I was crazy.  We went to the movies (saw I Am Number Four) and I didn't even have a craving for Red Vines or nachos.

Day 12 - I made a meat spaghetti sauce using a bottle of organic, Whole30 approved, Italian Herb sauce, threw in some minced garlic, chopped onions and organic meat.  For "noodles", I sliced up some zucchini and grilled it on the George Foreman grill.  Turned out yummy and filling.  Kept me going through the disaster that was me snowboarding Saturday night.  TB was brave enough to head to the Ridge with me.  Out of the 6 or seven runs we did, I only managed to get off the lift once without falling at some point.  The 5th or 6th fall was rather spectacular and I managed to take TB out with me much to Chels and Mistaya's amusement.  I have a collection of bruises and cuts to remember the evening by.  I struggled a bit when we were in the Lodge listening to music and hanging out.  The girls had Bailey's and coco and a huge amount of whipped cream while TB had a bacon cheeseburger.  I ate grapes and walnuts and sipped on my chamomile tea.  Mmm....  Or not.

Day 13 - Leftovers for lunch/dinner of the spaghetti sauce (even more delicious on Day 2) and a Whole30 smoothie made by Carrie which prompted me to buy the Magic Bullet blending system.  To be fair, I've been eyeing one of these for ages and finally decided to take the plunge since I'm having all this cooking fun.  Used my new apple corer to take apple slices to the Volleyball game with me where I proceeded to get hit in the nose, the chin and the knee.  Domestic Disaster, indeed.

Day 14 - I finally went back to work and faithfully packed a sack lunch only to be sent back home again.  I bought a spaghetti squash thinking it would be kind of like a zucchini but it was not.  Really was not.  So my attempt at having big slices of "noodles" with the very last of the spaghetti sauce didn't really pan out but now I know.  I also ate half of a HUGE red grapefruit.  The sucker cost me $3 and was a real b!#ch to peel but very tasty, not as sour as the little ones. 

WCotD = bread and okra.  Finally at least one of my cravings is for something that I can actually eat.  Sadly, okra is not in season right now.  I bet if I was near a Trader Joe's, they'd have some okra.  Bring a Trader Joe's to Wenatchee, WA!!!

You Spin My Head Right Round

I was too busy last night making fabulous tutus and taking ridiculous photos to post about Day 3 of the Whole30 diet last night so you're just going to get the highlights.

1.  Nearly passed out in Panther Circuit (need more calories!!)
2.  Nearly sliced my left pinky off (need proper supervision in the kitchen!!)
3.  Survived my first "meal" out (packed my own sack dinner)
4.  Made a tomato/cucumber/pepper/onion salad (yummy if not a little onion-heavy)
5.  Made  a tutu for the St. Patrick's Day Dash (started, next week is the Bling Session)
6.  WCotD = Salami (it was just sitting there, in front of me saying "Eat Me!!")

I could have provided Flo Rida's version but figured the Chipmunks version added a little bit extra to the occasion (plus, I spent Super Bowl Sunday watching animated movies so I'm sort of in the mood).

Healthy Body, Sick Mind?

Day two on the Island (aka the diet) and the natives are getting restless.  I could have cheerfully chewed off a couple of fingers and toes (protein, right?!) around 11pm last night when I woke up absolutely ravenous with nothing in the house to eat.  Luckily, Stella and Quinn were willing to share their carrot stick treats so I could eat and go back to sleep.  Stella paid me back with four ice cold feet to the lower back.  Good thing she's cute...

Today's food choices consisted of banana and apple slices for breakfast, plain water, a banana pre-run, rest of the curry for lunch, an orange for an afternoon snack, a lightly peppered piece of beef for dinner before heading out to derby practice, a banana and some walnuts for my evening snack.  I felt pretty good all day, even slogged out a 2 mile run (first time since November).  Managed to make it through the afternoon without dying for something sweet and sugary.  But that doesn't mean there wasn't a weird craving.  It just hit later in the day.  Weird Craving of the Day (WCotD) was for Easy Cheese.  You know that awful yet oh so delicious stuff in a can?  Yeah.  That.  Anyone who shows up at my front door on Day 31 with a can of that $h!t will be mine FOREVER. 

Would go great with Bacon Vodka.  Just saying.

I've been looking at recipes out of the Paleo Diet book (the original, not the cookbook) and some of the recipes look pretty tasty!! Lemon Pepper Pork Steaks - I'm looking at you.  I've also ordered a couple other books from the library based on recommendations from friends.  Bought a tub of coconut oil.  Chunky.  Different.  We'll see how that goes...

I'm pretty sure I'll dream of cheese again tonight.  Yummy, nasty stuff from a can.  What can I say, healthy body...sick, sick mind.  I'll leave you with Operation Ivy singing the song of the day - the lyrics are pretty accurate:

Expensive vitamin pills and wheat germ on your windowsill

Schedule's hectic and you got no time to kill

Earning money and you're spending it the right way

Just in such a rush

You don't know if it's night or day

5:30 get up, run run run

Then you work eight hours slaving under the gun

Your little world's based on lies lies lies

Always rushing but you're never ever satisfied...

Healthy body sick mind

Working overtime

Healthy body sick mind

Too hectic, too hectic

Healthy body sick mind

Why don't you justify

It's just a matter of time

Sick body sick mind

The money you spend on running shoes could feed me for a week

Your plans are laid so well you can't even sleep

Pursuit of happiness got your life locked under martial law

You got everything to lose so you're paranoid about some fatal flaw